What do you get from an Alaskan cow?

My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing him..

What do you call two monkeys sharing an Amazon account?

What do you call a hotel with really bad customer service?

What is the worst holiday to watch old westerns on?

What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?

What do you call an artistic dog?

Which animal will never go bald?

What happened to the chicken whose feathers were all pointing the wrong way?

What do your grandma and the internet have in common?

Who do fish see when they aren't feeling well?

Why did the mathematician decline a beer at the party?

Which tree can't stop crying?

Daughter: "What's it like to have the greatest daughter in the world?"

Why is Peter Pan™ always flying?